CleverDonkey.com …Musings, Commentary, Opinions, and Drivel

It’s Oscar Sunday again!!
We will be posting live updates during the broadcast all night! (Well… sort of live… we run about an hour behind on the TiVo cache to capture these images for your amusement. Do you see how we bleed for you, anonymous public? Do you SEE?!)

We hear Diablo Cody is wearing diamond shoes tonight but haven’t seen them yet. However, if they do appear, rest assured that those pics and MANY more will be posted throughout the evening and into the wee morning hours. Look for extra dishiness, cattiness, and typos as we get progressively more punchdrunk and actually drunk as I start to nip into the limoncello.

Top Honors

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Red, V’d, and Black

There was a trifecta trend this Emmy season — everyone seemed to either be wearing some shade of cranberry or fuschia, a deeply v’d halter dress, or basic black — or some combination therein. Satin was the texture of choice as well, with very few folks going for the old guard designers, preferring instead newer designers such as Loris Azzaro or Bottega Veneta.

Red Goddesses

Heidi Klum was the reigning red goddess in a deep cranberry tone; she was absolutely a vision in Dior, soft hair, and earrings of her own design.

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Weirdest Trend of the Night: Bruise Chic
So, black and blue is an unusual combo, but both Maggie Gyllenhaal and Portia DeRossi combined them with elegant results.

Maggie wears the one-shoulder well, although I’m not sure if her hair accessory is feathers or an oil slick. I guess neither is very PC, though, given this is the first environmentally friendly Oscars, eh?

Portia’s slender frame works quite well with the cutaway and shimmery fabric.

Things I Normally Don’t Like That I Liked For Some Reason

I have never ever seen a Zac Posen dress I liked… ever… until this gorgeous terra cotta pleated sheath.

I generally think Celine Dion dresses

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Am I just getting old and crabby? Maybe the chardonnay is making me more catty than normal. Either way, enjoy.

Likes!

Kyra Sedgwick’s asymmetrical goddess gown was a delight

The Clothes-er
Living well is the best revenge — Reese Witherspoon is radiant (if a bit thin) in kicky yellow satin with some fiery red shoes

These Laboutins are made for walkin’
24′s Mary Lynn Rajskub was adorable in her white column and shoulder duster earrings

Satellite uplink achieved!
Renee Zellweger, despite looking like she always has a pillbug in her mouth, was indeed beautiful in emerald satin

Mmmbllhdbblldlds… blech
What all the Grecian cheerleaders are wearing!!

Hayden Pannettiere’s Grecian Monique L’Huillier frock and fall are lovely and young
The always adorable and fresh Kate Winslet in Ungaro

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Oscar Arrives!

Argent de Poche

Strangely, pockets were a mini-theme this year… both Amy Adams and Sandra Bullock wore blossomy dresses with pockets, and both looked utterly relaxed. I guess a beautiful gown with pockets just makes you feel less stressed, like you’re just hanging out.

Amy Adams’s striped Carolina Herrera was gorgeous and elegant

Sandra chats calmly during the red carpet mixing

Pales in Comparison

It’s official, I will never like pale colors on the red carpet. Color, people, color!!

Naomi Watts was radiant as always, but that washed-out Givenchy did not do it for me… I actually liked the gauzy messiness of it all, but I just can’t stand that pale color on her!!

I had a really bad run-in with King Kong before the show

Naomi’s b.f. Nicole Kidman was similarly milk-toast in

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Click here for the CURRENT YEAR’S Golden Globes Report

Wow… it looked like every guy there was going to be a groomsman in the same wedding. Nothing was a huge standout, and all the tuxes were very conservative! (I actually approve of this). The women didn’t necessarily stand out, either, although there were a few flashes of elegance. Black predominated, along with plunging necklines. I guess folks are holding out the big guns for the Oscars!! None of the jewel-tones from last year really appeared (although there was a Desperate Housewife in coral):

You’ve Heard of Washboard Abs? I’ve Got a Washboard Chest!

The trend I really loved was no bronzing!! Thank goodness nobody there felt as though they had to look as though they’d flown in from St. Bart’s. There were some absolutely gorgeous ladies with wonderfully porcelain skin.

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Oscar 2006 Fashion Report!

Click here for the 2006 report!

Oscar 2005 Fashion Report Archive

Well, at least there was some color this year! There weren’t too many standouts – my favorite was probably Helen Mirren. She just looked utterly drop-dead gorgeous, no kidding – fun and elegant but unfussy. A close second was Catalina Sandino Moreno, who was the perfect mixture of classy and sexy with a white Roberto Cavalli and a long, sleek ponytail.

Likes:

Beyoncé, for the two seconds she was wearing her “on the red carpet” dress looked great in black velvet — almost a disturbingly hourglass figure, but she looked very elegant — simple dress, big earrings, not-too-fussy hairstyle. I was sick of her by the end of the Oscar telecast, however – they should’ve gotten some other people to sing some of those songs.

Helen Mirren looked fabulous — sexy, eclectic, elegant, put-together, and utterly beautiful.

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Click here for the CURRENT YEAR’S Golden Globes Report

This is the 2005 report.

Likes:

Angelica Huston was gorgously wonderful in a simple long black dress with loads of diamond necklaces. It was a great look, sumptuous and very sexy.

Mariska Hargitay once again looked stunning in Vera Wang (also her choice for the Emmys), this time in a medium pink silk column with ring detail at the shoulder.

Glenn Close in a beautiful black Geoffrey Beene, worn to honor him (he recently passed away).

Jennifer Garner was classy in a bright red gown; whether or not she chose that color to synchronize with the release of Elektra is anyone’s guess.

Kim Raver from 24 looked great in a pale yellow chiffon wrap Carmen Marc Valvo (but then again I’m super-partial to this guy, seeing as how every fancy gown I own is Carmen Marc Valvo). She accesorized with a

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In general, there were no really horrific messes this year and not too many standouts. Mariska Hargitay wins top honors for best dressed at the Emmys in a gorgeous, gorgeous, absolutely classic outfit – a beautiful apple green Vera Wang column dress-and-a-train complete with a tropical flower in the hair. She just glowed and looked every inch the classic Hollywood goddess. (I guess being a newlywed helped, she was just smiling the whole time as well).

For the most part I liked:

Heather Locklear’s wine-colored goddess dress
Portia Di Rossi’s classic Givenchy with great Diane Von Furstenburg jewelry.
Marlo Thomas’s classy white column as she accepted her father’s Bob Hope Humanitarian Award.
Drea de Matteo’s beautiful and slightly renaissance-looking black and gold frock.
Kim Catrall in a simple but fun pink Pamela Rowland – her overall look was just so simple and effortless.
Jennifer Anniston’s gorgeous white tube dress from Chanel with a very Indian gold design.
Cheryl

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Oscar 2006 Fashion Report

Click here for this year’s Oscar report!

Oscar 2004 Fashion Report Archive

This is last year’s Fashion Report. Click here for the 2005 Fashion Report!

Wow, one month less of planning and consultation with designers makes an awful lot of difference… the 2004 crop of Oscar dresses was quite disappointing. The best dress I saw was Melissa Rivers’ on the E! pre-game show! Next to hers was probably Jennifer Garner’s vintage Valentino in a gorgeous shade of dark coral… trim, classy, and perfectly paired with some heavy Byzantine gold bracelets and a gorgeous set of gold and crystal earrings.

Beyond those two standouts, everyone’s dress was ordinary or awful… mostly just ordinary! Just like at the Golden Globes, Catherine Zeta-Jones once again chose a dress that looked like a long skirt sewed onto a 1940’s swimsuit… she definitely needs to try a more interesting neckline once in a while.

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